Contrary to what anyone says, I think parenting and relationships is a hard process. I think it’s also a wonderful process. I lucked out to find a great person for my partner and I lucked out again with the births of my kids. I don’t always appreciate the luck in the middle of the night, but at the same time, I even love the hard times because they are part of this entire wonderful package. (It also helps that my kids have had a pretty good week)
Three years ago I was pregnant.
Two years ago I had a darling cute little boy that smiled at everybody. He couldn’t sleep through the night worth a lick, but he was sweet and smiley and fun to carry around anyplace everywhere and anywhere. I was also pregnant again.
One year ago I had a darling cute little boy and a loud little girl that made her voice known far and wide.
And now I have a sweet little boy who loves to do puzzles and loves to cuddle and a sweet little girl who is shy and determined and loves to hang upside down and jump on two feet and plaster me with open mouthed kisses.
My husband and I are still together.
We’ve weathered through the long nights of no sleep, the “discussions” about who is more tired, more exhausted and more in need of compassion from the other. We’ve experimented with how to structure our weekend so that the lack of structure results in a pleasant home, engaged kids and happy adults. It’s been a process!
And it still is, but now it’s easier to see that a night of teething has an end in sight. My husband and I reserve our “discussions” till after our first cup of coffee and we’ve transitioned into a way of being where our lives are second fiddle to our kids. No, not second fiddle – just where now we don’t think of what we want to do, but rather what we want to do with the kids.
I remember being thankful that newborns slept so much and were so easy because it gave us time to adjust our lives to the new little beings. And as they began taking up more time and demanding more attention, they also became more and more fun. Life was so much simpler with newborns that couldn’t roll over or who were content to get carried around to dinner parties and musical events. Now, we are spending our evening DOING things with the kids and there are no more evenings of just flitting around town willy nilly. We have bedtimes that rule our lives.
At the moment little boy is getting a lesson in putting on socks from my husband. Little boy is producing little sounds of pain as he struggles with this task that he so wants to do. Little girl is throwing the other sock off the table and watching intently what is going on. And now it is time for cleaning up and brushing teeth and the entire nighttime routine.
Our lives are covered and sauteed and filled to the brim with our kids. I love some time away to run errands or go work a bit or take a longer shower than needed, but overall, I can’t imagine anything different. Well, I CAN imagine things different, but this is so much more messy and fun.